track 2 verse 3 last bar.. illmatic

i can't sleep.
my mind is like a cafeteria

shotgun.

what do we impose upon the other person in the relationship when we meet/mate?

we tell them our deepest darkest secrets. we expect them to keep them regardless if they are actually trustworthy people.

we expect for them to understand, and be great listeners when in reality they may be mostly apathetic cold people. we expect this because we expect perfection, no we demand perfection out of our mate.
But we must understand they simply may not be built like that.not all boyfriends need to listen.. not all girlfriends need to have great conversation.
i can dominate a conversation so i dont even need someone who likes talk in a realtionshi
i want someone who has flaws where i have strength,
and compensates for mine, (weaknesses)

My Girl is not the best giver, lol she doesn't really partake in the surprise presents and the middle school anniversaries..

Thats cool tho..
because i THINK THAT SHIT IS CORNY..
SEE strengths / weaknesses

but in the end we still do come up short..
i want my girlfriend to now that i do think about how hard it is for her to be doing what se is doing right now but, i do care about myself also and people get so wrapped up in being selfless that they forget to allow their partner to be selfish. in fact you should allow them to vent as much as you want.. vent back share your consciousness because in fact when you put all of those things to together you each appreciate the fact that each person is going through it and you will feel much more secure with them.. you know they are just as confused as you .. and in a weird way it's reassuring

you gotta let that shit go. man
it's so hard but when you mad at them you gotta look at the big picture take a look at where this car is going .. and if you dont like the destination.. jump out.

teenage crisis

im to young for this

since when did we become so self of aware of our places in time and history .. when harry met Sally, do you think harry said? sally i got shit to do so we can't be falling madly in love until we're at least stable financially.
thats what we have here, a bunch of fucking people that do not look for love... or even happiness.. because love doesn't fit with their idea of what their life was gonna be like without that person.. newsflash shit changed when you met them.. you cannot expect to find love if your fitting it in you schedule .. after college before menopause?
what about before 30 but after i fuck enough drunk people? whichever comes first..
what are the circumstances of which we truly let ourselves go and engross ourselves into the person from whom.. we get that feeling..

okay...

hiatus.. gonna do this again later with more resources.. cause this cant be one of those look at at tehse shoes blogs it gotta be something deeper than that.. it's deeper than blogging.. rawse!

simple bitches,

girls are dumb.. ya;ll think ya'll players but you always getting fucked either literally
"awww yeah uhh i'm in control of this"
no you not .. when a nigga really want he can get it and we do everytime.
you think you playing me cause you talk to me? and him? i talk to her her & her

do you know that no.. and you try to play the middle and fuck with both of us. nahhhhhhh he talk to her her & her too so that makes us 6 and you 2.. you lose simple bitch .. now you need a real nigga maybe you not a real bitch???????


& girls claim love.. but love don't give you a free pass to be stupid..
a bitch will scream love in the face of overwhelming odds ..

thats why we like that now. cause ya'll try to play the game but can't no girl play it like a nigga can. i'm sleepy .. that's why i got out this shit and stayed with candace =D

desire..

Jayelectrolisis..

I'm just a sleep walking robot that's out of gear..i stick my nose out the water to the sky for air..

Love

Man it just struck me how hard my parents work for me I gotta pay them back I just don't know if going through college is how I'm going to pay them back. I just really realize how much they must love. Me. & My brother. It makes me sick how people say. I never knew you had abrother. Ughh. I'm sorry lord I got some shit I gotta get together. These niggas always came through for me and all I can do is take advantage of their kidnness. *sigh*

It's gonna be some shit that's gonna make it real hard to sleep at night.

I feel like i'm not happy with my life. I am happy with Candace and I barley think about Jada any more I feel this sneaking suspicion that she's not living her life like she said she was gonna. Isn't it funny how people try to control ypur life from a far. They try to guilt you into not having sex with other people or drinkingabd smoking but then they do it. Damn o was dumb. Anyway I feel like my realtionship with my brother is beyond repair and I was listening to j Cole. And I thought what if he died I'd be fucked up manwell of course I would be I don't think about death as much as the average person. I think about it about once efery year. Because nobody ever died in life that I care about I never knew my three other grandparents and o can't fathomt my last grandma dieing. I wanna repair of relationship but o don't know where to start. I want a real brother that I cantalk to andshit I always say later on in life but what if it never come. Excuse the grammar I did this blog from an itouch too.